The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz is one of my ALL TIME favorite books. Not only is a great guide for living your life, but also for running your business, especially if you are in network marketing like I am!
Here is a brief synopsis: “Based on ancient Toltec wisdom, the Four Agreements offer a powerful code of conduct that can rapidly transform our lives and our work into a new experience of effectiveness, balance and self-supporting behavior.
Everything we do is based on agreements we have made. In these agreements we tell ourselves who we are, what everything else is, how to act, what is possible and what is impossible. What we have agreed to believe creates what we experience. When these agreements come from fear, obstacles develop, keeping us from realizing our greatest potential.
Most of the agreements we made were as children so many of us as adults are trapped in beliefs that no longer serve us. Some are so outdated that they make our lives much harder than they need to be and in turn we feel trapped and unhappy. Suffering has become “normal” for us. By following these four agreements, we will be free from our past outdated agreements and free to live the life we choose to live.”
Here are the Four Agreements:
BE IMPECCABLE WITH YOUR WORD
Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.
Most of us use our words negatively whether toward ourselves or others such as gossip, negative self-talk, and discouragement. We often say things to ourselves and others out of anger, frustration, and jealousy.
Always use your word for good. Always tell the truth.
DON’T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY
Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own issues. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.
If you take something someone says to you personally, it is because you believe it to be true, you agree with what they are saying/doing to you.
When you take things personally, you create conflict because you have the need to defend yourself.
When you take something personally it’s because a part of you believes it is true.
You are NEVER responsible for the actions of others, only for the action of yourself.
DON’T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS
Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness, and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.
We make assumptions about almost everything. The problem with making assumptions is that we believe them to be the truth.
We make assumptions because we don’t have the courage to ask questions. One way to keep yourself from making assumptions is to ask questions. Keep asking until you know the truth.
You always have the right to ask anything and people always have the right to say yes or no. Just as people have the right to ask you anything and you have the right to answer yes or no.
The day you stop making assumptions, you will communicate clearly and cleanly and you will be free of the emotion and drama attached to assumptions.
ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST
Your best is going to change from moment to moment. It will be different when you are healthy as
opposed to sick, awake as opposed to tired, and happy as opposed to sad. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgement, self-abuse, and regret.
As you grow and change, you best will become better.
When you do your best you never have regrets and you can love and accept yourself for exactly who you are.
Always take action.
Here is how the Four Agreements relates to your business and practical steps you can take to help make your biz…and your life…easier. BONUS!!
Agreement 1 ¬ BE IMPECCABLE WITH YOUR WORD
Most importantly, to be impeccable with your word is to never use it against yourself. Putting yourself down will stop the creative process in your business. With others, speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Your word is your bond ¬ you will create consistency in the delivery of your service or product, and create a trust with your clientele, empowering you to expand. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth.
Write down one time in your business where you used your word negatively or someone used their word negatively against you. How did it make them/you feel? What could you have done/said differently?
Agreement 2 ¬ DON’T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY
In business, especially as a leader, you have to let things roll off your back – nothing others do to you or say to you is because of you. It is their perception or belief. Being attached to your opinion is where freedom is lost. When you are immune to the opinion of others, you can clearly focus on your objective and¬ avoid the drama.
Write down a time in your business where you took something personally. How did it make you feel? If you didn’t take it personally, how would it feel different?
Agreement 3 – DON’T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS
It is critical to your business to communicate with others as clearly as you can with your intentions to avoid misunderstandings. Also, have the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want from your consultants, hostesses, and customers. You will see huge strides in your business success when you do this.
Write down one example in your business where you made an assumption. How did it affect the outcome? How would the outcome be different had you NOT made that assumption?
Agreement 4 ¬ ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST
Always do your best at the moment. You will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret. Plus, think of how amazing your business would be if you truly always did your best!!
Write down one thing you want in your business. Have you been doing your very best to get it? What can you do differently so you make sure to get it? Are you taking action? How would it feel to know you did everything in your power to get to where you wanted to go?
Here is how you can start applying these to your life and your business. Pick one agreement that you will focus on for the next 30 days, I would pick the one you feel is your weakness. Write down three things you are going to do differently this month in that area. After 30 days, pick the next one and so on. After 4 months I would repeat, again starting with your weak link (it may have changed after the four month period).
These four agreements take practice, awareness, commitment and time. But if you always do your best at them, you will start to see amazing things happen in your life and your business.
I have been practicing the four agreements for about ten years now and my life is getting easier and easier. My advice to you is to take a risk and love yourself. Live your life to the fullest. Say yes when you want to say yes and say no when you want to say no.
And always always do your best.
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