People often ask me what the challenges are being a mom of a baby at age 46. Since Coura is my first baby, I really don’t know what to compare to as far as if my challenges are different than the challenges of, let’s say, a 26-year-old mom, or a 36-year-old mom.
I think there are challenges being a mother at any age, so I don’t know if mine are any different than anyone else’s.
Here are MY biggest challenges as a mom…
1. Being tired all the time! Like ALL. THE. TIME!
My baby didn’t sleep more than 2 to 3 hours at a time until she was 9 months old. Then she’s miraculously started sleeping through the night, 6 to 8 hours at a time.
I thought I would start feeling normal. Not the case. Even now, at 16 months old, she typically sleeps 10 to 12 hours a night.
But half the week, she goes to sleep before I’m even home from work, so there goes my opportunity!
I’m trying like crazy to fit everything I want to do into my life, and it’s much easier to do all the things while she is asleep. So I find myself training, cleaning, organizing, working, etc all while she is sleeping.
This ends up cutting into my personal sleep time, so I’m still tired. I know I need to give some things up, but I just can’t decide what to put less energy into because I love every single thing I do!
2. I have less control of my life.
Like the lack of sleep, having a baby give me less time and choices for my own life, so it doesn’t surprise me that is still a challenge.
I used to be meticulous in planning my minute to minute schedule, now I plan a “sort of” schedule which changes constantly throughout the day. It took some getting used to, and it’s not what comes naturally to me, but I am adjusting.
The other challenge is that I don’t get to make all the decisions for my life and my baby. There is obviously a father involved and I’m not used to having to have someone else’s permission/opinion in making my day-to-day decisions and planning for my future.
3. Mommy guilt.
I do have mommy guilt, but it’s not toward my baby. I give her tons of love, affection, attention, consideration, time, and energy.
What I feel guilty about, is the lack of mommying I am doing toward my first two babies, Joey and Belle, my two fuzzy kids who used to get all of me and now barely get any of me. I am grateful they love me unconditionally because anyone else who got that little of my time, would definitely be out the door!
For me, being an older parent, the pros outweigh the cons. I care less about what other people think about me and my mommying, I already know how to take care of myself and make sure I am healthy and happy, and I don’t sweat the small stuff.
All of these would have been more of a problem if I had Coura 10 or 20 years ago.
I have also been fortunate enough to have had such a full life and had already done so many things and accomplished so much before having her.
So slowing down to care for a baby is fine with me. Like I have a choice ha ha!
Thanks to all the moms out there who have supported me over the last year and reached out to me with a hug or a pat on the back or a kind word or a “you got this mama”.
It has truly meant the world to me during the times where I felt like I wasn’t going to make it through another dark night.
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