I would love to believe that, but I’m not really sure I do. I spent most of last year without a lot of money. But I had very few expenses so I made enough to support my lifestyle at the time.
This year however has been different. Knowing I was going to have a child, I obviously had to put down some roots. This meant renting a house. Along with the house comes money needed for utilities, upkeep, and several expenses that I haven’t had for a while.
Having my baby a month early cut my preparation short as I was relying on those last four weeks to make money to get me through those first few months with a newborn.
When Coura was born, I had a little money saved, but after four weeks of not working, that money was gone. The next six weeks for me were full of stress, anxiety, and overwhelm because I had no money for anything other than the bare necessities.
I would “try “working at first at night while I was feeding Coura, and then during the day while she was napping, but that ended quickly as I was exhausted myself and needed more than 3 to 5 hours of sleep in a 24-hour period. I was tired, I was gaining weight from eating crap from being tired, and I was stressing myself, and I’m sure my baby, in the process.
My friends kept saying to me “taking care of your baby is your number one priority, that’s all you should be thinking about, you don’t need to be working right now, that’s why people take maternity leave.” But a lot of people who take maternity leave are getting paid for it. Since I own my own businesses, I wasn’t!
Essentially if I needed food, supplements, dog food, clothes, or to even pay my bills, I had to ask for help. This literally made my stomach sick just thinking about it. I don’t often wait until the very last second, and by then I was in emotional wreck, so my asking for help usually ended up as a cry fest and me feeling like a failure, worthless, not good at anything, and unable to take care of myself or my baby.
When Coura was two months old, I was given the opportunity to start working again. It would be a total of about four hours a day, and was a challenge to make it work, but I just kept looking at the money that would be coming and, even small amounts, to take the edge off of how I was feeling.
Some days after just a couple hours of sleep, I would have to get up, feed and change Coura, pack her up and take her to grandma’s, and then drive over an hour to coach. I typically don’t do well on four or six hours of sleep, but I knew when I saw money coming in, to contribute to my life financially, it would all be worth it. And it was.
When my first paycheck came in, I was able to catch up on many of the things I had been behind on like my vitamins, supplements, healthy food, fruits and vegetables, dog food, formula, diapers, full tank of gas, oil change, soap, shampoo, and a few other things I had been skimping on over the previous couple months.
That paycheck was gone within minutes, but huge weight was lifted off of me. I felt better, and happier, than I had in weeks, despite my fatigue and lack of upkeep and other areas of my life. That little amount of money, made a huge difference in my life. It gave me hope , peace of mind, and I felt like I could breathe again.
So did that paycheck make me happier? You bet your ass it did!
Not having money takes a lot more time, effort, patience, and energy, none of which I had being a new mom.
I have been working consistently now for the past 3 months and it has made a world of difference. This month is the first month since Coura was born that I have enough money to pay ALL my bills and my expenses!!! And YES! That does make me happy!!!
If you feel hopeless or frustrated about money, just start somewhere (anywhere) to bring in a little more! There are so many opportunities today with the internet and small jobs here and there that may not seem like they will be helpful, but they are!
WE GOT THIS!
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